The Night Weasels Cometh
I did not race my bike this weekend. It was a combination of post-24HOGGum depression and lack of appealing options. This lead to some incredibly productive downtime, some of which even happened without the aid of caffeine. Check it out.
I made the crossresults.com team site. Did I mention that I started a team? I think so. So far they are a beautiful army of misfit cyclist who heed my beck and call. This past weekend they kicked off the season and did hilariously poorly. I already love them. Except for Kevin.
The crossresults.com kits came in this week and they look fabulous. One thing I forgot to mention last time I was gushing about them, these aren't the team kits so much as the website kits. The team will be racing in skinsuits with a different but equally sexy color scheme. If you were avoiding purchase of one of these because you didn't want to own the kit of team you don't race for... fear not. This will just let people know that you like THE INTERNET, and especially RESULTS. Which is a good thing to put out there when meeting new people.
Here are some true quotes from the first few folks to sport the kit publicly:
If you want to join them in heart-rate-elevating sexiness, email me! Quantities are surprisingly limited.
Aside from all the crossresults.com teamsturbation I've been doing, Linnea, Chip and I have been cooking up a pretty exciting night race. I've been trying to find a venue for a night race near Boston for over a year now, but after getting rudely squelched by Nashoba last year I'd kind of given up hope... until Chip-o-lini got involved this summer and started doing the dirty work of cold calling people on the phone and charming them into letting us use their property.
Chip hit the jackpot with Ski Ward in Shrewsbury. They're close enough to Boston and Providence, (35/50 miles), they've got a huge amount of cross-rideable terrain under lights, and they're nearly as stoked on doing a cross race as we are. It's pretty awesome to walk around a venue and have every single what-if question answered with a positive from the owner himself.
So it's totally on. October 6th, the Wednesday between Gloucester and Providence. I should stop writing this blog post right now and start filing USAC forms, but let's do a quick information dump before we go:
Race Schedule:
5:30 PM - Cat 4 Men (Merch, large bag of sand)
6:30 PM - Cat 3 Men (Merch, small bag of sand)
7:30 PM - Elite Women 1/2/3 ($1999/15)
7:30 PM - Cat 4 Women (Merch, possibility finishing on the lead lap, ziploc bag of sand)
8:30 PM - Elite Men 1/2/3 ($1999/15 + $175 bonus money for the top 40+ dudes)
Three dismounts per lap
Quite a bit of climbing, but we've got JD doing course consulting so it will be cool
Quite a bit of descending, and I'm a mountain biker so it will be cool
Richard Fries being Richard Fries
Crossresults.com staging
As many Pro riders as I can possibly bribe into attending
In short, it's basically going to be a Verge race. But at night. Should you be there? HOLYSHITYES.
If this sounds so awesome that you and your business would like to be a title sponsor...email me, and I'll even throw in a crossresults.com kit on the side. That's right, your employer/business could potentially be buying you one of those baller kits I started the post with. Come on man, you read all the way to the end, you deserve it!
I made the crossresults.com team site. Did I mention that I started a team? I think so. So far they are a beautiful army of misfit cyclist who heed my beck and call. This past weekend they kicked off the season and did hilariously poorly. I already love them. Except for Kevin.
The crossresults.com kits came in this week and they look fabulous. One thing I forgot to mention last time I was gushing about them, these aren't the team kits so much as the website kits. The team will be racing in skinsuits with a different but equally sexy color scheme. If you were avoiding purchase of one of these because you didn't want to own the kit of team you don't race for... fear not. This will just let people know that you like THE INTERNET, and especially RESULTS. Which is a good thing to put out there when meeting new people.
Here are some true quotes from the first few folks to sport the kit publicly:
"Why yes, I did design this kit, ladies."
"I'm still wearing the kit I designed yaaaaaaaay"
"I probably shouldn't tell Embro James that my HR is 170 just wearing this kit."
Aside from all the crossresults.com teamsturbation I've been doing, Linnea, Chip and I have been cooking up a pretty exciting night race. I've been trying to find a venue for a night race near Boston for over a year now, but after getting rudely squelched by Nashoba last year I'd kind of given up hope... until Chip-o-lini got involved this summer and started doing the dirty work of cold calling people on the phone and charming them into letting us use their property.
Chip hit the jackpot with Ski Ward in Shrewsbury. They're close enough to Boston and Providence, (35/50 miles), they've got a huge amount of cross-rideable terrain under lights, and they're nearly as stoked on doing a cross race as we are. It's pretty awesome to walk around a venue and have every single what-if question answered with a positive from the owner himself.
So it's totally on. October 6th, the Wednesday between Gloucester and Providence. I should stop writing this blog post right now and start filing USAC forms, but let's do a quick information dump before we go:
Race Schedule:
5:30 PM - Cat 4 Men (Merch, large bag of sand)
6:30 PM - Cat 3 Men (Merch, small bag of sand)
7:30 PM - Elite Women 1/2/3 ($1999/15)
7:30 PM - Cat 4 Women (Merch, possibility finishing on the lead lap, ziploc bag of sand)
8:30 PM - Elite Men 1/2/3 ($1999/15 + $175 bonus money for the top 40+ dudes)
Three dismounts per lap
Quite a bit of climbing, but we've got JD doing course consulting so it will be cool
Quite a bit of descending, and I'm a mountain biker so it will be cool
Richard Fries being Richard Fries
Crossresults.com staging
As many Pro riders as I can possibly bribe into attending
In short, it's basically going to be a Verge race. But at night. Should you be there? HOLYSHITYES.
If this sounds so awesome that you and your business would like to be a title sponsor...email me, and I'll even throw in a crossresults.com kit on the side. That's right, your employer/business could potentially be buying you one of those baller kits I started the post with. Come on man, you read all the way to the end, you deserve it!
Course map by Linnea -- 100% accurate
Comments
A: The same group that you didn't slot in a race time for at Ski Ward.
bad colin
Also Colin, do you see that? Blocking out the sun? That is my MASSIVE BONER for this bicycling event.
maybe matt can try and win the bag of sand in the 3 race
Steven: Yes, you'll have to actually podium for me to consider you a sandbagger.
Todd: The dragon will be IN YOUR LEGS at the top of the climb.
Those dudes seriously resent being forced to race with and against younger riders.
Btw, I have not officially upgraded yet. THE BAG OF SAND SHALL BE MINE!
How is the lighting at night?
Remember?
You crashed trying to chase me down.
I won.
It is on my race resume.